friday night, 6pm

ALL KIOSKS AND NO BEER MAKE TOAD A DULL BOY
ALL KIOSKS AND NO BEER MAKE TOAD A DULL BOY
ALL KIOSKS AND NO BEER MAKE TOAD A DULL BOY
ALL KIOSKS AND NO BEER MAKE TOAD A DULL BOY
ALL KIOSKS AND NO BEER MAKE TOAD A DULL BOY
ALL KIOSKS AND NO BEER MAKE TOAD A DULL BOY
ALL KIOSKS AND NO BEER MAKE TOAD A DULL BOY
ALL KIOSKS AND NO BEER MAKE TOAD A DULL BOY
ALL KIOSKS AND NO BEER MAKE TOAD A DULL BOY
ALL KIOSKS AND NO BEER MAKE TOAD A DULL BOY

:)

yay, horestore is open and running perfectly. Willie Brown had the luck of being the first customer and i went to the the post office today and shipped everything so everyone should be getting their orders soon.

Last night i sang don’t cry for me argentina…i butchered that song…madonna is rolling over in her grave…..after that i did some cats in the cradle which i thought i did wonderfully. Ken even bought me a beer afterwards, so i must be good right?

just think

just think toad, everywhere, all over the world, millions of people are getting laid.

and your updating your site.

so toad, how exactly does that make you feel…

ugh tonight we went out. I didn’t want to go, i was really tired…after a vodka and cranberry and a change of clothes i was up on it. It’s open mike night at the full moon and that translates to karoke. I play a few games of pool, i strut up on stage, drop the jacket and we sing Lucky Star and Daniel by Elton John. The guy that was playing, some fucking lamer, who was taking his terrible singing so serious, complained we sang a extra song.

fuck him, it was funny.

get in my way now, sek

k, still drinking, coding and talking on aim…got the front of the site in ummm i guess order….i dunno if i like it but i don’t care at this point…moving on to the rants section

sek gave me a formal insult that i won’t finish the shopping cart before i pass out…im about to prove him wrong

ian says i don’t have to change for anyone.

*sips drink*

last night was a prime example of why i need to just build a log cabin in the woods and shun the rest of the planet until my time of death.

Like i’ve done enough drugs(this morning) to have a pretty healthy sense of perspective. I can usually feel what other people are thinking or feeling just by judging. I’m not saying i can read minds but i can usually tell how other people are feeling by how they act and what they say.

To prove this, im going to write about this double “date” we went on last night from the viewpoint of toad’s date. We’ll call her Sue. Sue and her friend…we’ll call her Tori. Why not, it’s my fucking site. Anyway, Sue and Tori show up and Sue’s date, toad, is wearing green army cargo pants and blazing a crackhore.com shirt. Tori declares she is hungry so we decide to go out to eat. I ask ian if i should change clothes and ian turns to me and says “toad, you don’t have to change for anyone”.

Now have you ever seen a snowball roll down a hill and turn into a huge boulder at the bottom? Well that one phrase was the snowball.

From that moment on a demon came out that usually only comes out once in a while. Anyway, toad being the LEAST sober person in the room, has to drive. I still don’t know why toad was driving but the story goes on. We go out to eat, Tori’s boyfriend calls in the middle, she lies and says she’s with Dave and Ilan. We both start laughing and asking which one is Ilan, or whoever you spell it, we finish our food and go drinking.

I only remember the huge mug of beer i had the last bar. We get home, more bluriness, Sue leaves, gets pulled over like less then a block away from the apartment, still not sure what happened with that. I was laying in bed really drunk laughing that that poor girl got pulled over when she could have been laying in bed with me. Or maybe it was better she got pulled over, we’re trying to write this from another perspective….

Here is the away message i found in my clipboard this morning…gotta post it. Tells you a little about my preperation for going out.

SCOUTmasterTOAD: ugh their here!
SCOUTmasterTOAD: no more aim
SCOUTmasterTOAD: *turns off gin and juice off repeat*”

oh god, i’ve gone and done it again

ugh i need to learn to keep my fucking stoned mouth shut sometimes.

I was at a quick-e-lube place today to get my oil changed today. Now a minute before, and picture this in your head, i’m driving down the road, screaming at the top of my lungs to Gin And Juice being played on 107 and smoking. When i pass this one car, this huge black man looks over and starts laughing. Must have been listening to Hot 107 too…

I have trouble pulling into one of the little bays cuz he opens a different door then the one i pulled up to. I let the oil guy do it, he sees the crackhore sticker and says “Did too many drugs today?” and i smile and say “well, no hard drugs”. Then he gets in the car to pull it in and starts laughing. I break out my book and try not to look so obvious I come out to get my car and we start talking and he’s like “hey i liked what you were playing in there, we were listening to that”. Had Tool Aenima in the cd player. I tell him, doesn’t sound like he’s heard of them and i’m like “hey you should check out my site.” I point at the sticker say “yeah you’ll probably be on after the way i pulled in” I try to explain my site further, end up telling him. I drive off, laughing to myself.

Later on i start thinking. Can you imagine changing someone’s oil with crackhore stickers on it and then have them tell you that you’re probably going to be on it must be pretty fucked up….ugh oh well