okay imma start this story around 3am yesterday when i drove to alex’s to drink. i roll in, tie marla to my chair, and drink god knows how many beers. At 6:45am, me and marla drive back to my dad’s office where i’ve basically been living.

Pretty drunk at this point and decided that i was tired of moving this huge bag of shrooms from freezer to freezer since my apartment is still down, that i could just eat them all and not have to worry about it.

Well around 8am people start showing up for work to find the boss’s son drunk with a head full of shrooms. The whole reason i came back to bartlett was to get my car fixed so i went to the car stereo place, somehow explain to them the problem, then had a very very intresting wait. I maintained my sanity by reading a magazine over and over and trying not to have conversations with anyone.

Finally the car is done, i go back to the office, eat the rest of the mushrooms and decide that this is no longer a safe place. I collect my dog, get in the car, almost hit a Escalade truck cuz i was distracted by my dog melting. It’s 11am, i havn’t been to bed, im tripping my head off and i really need to find sanctuary.

I toy with the idea of just parking my car in a parking lot and sleeping there but i figure since my dad’s at the office i can go to their house. Terrible decision. I get there and theres a red Mustang in our driveway and some guy starts asking me questions about storm damage and insurance. I tell him i have no idea what he’s talking about, repeating over and over that im just here to sleep. He says it’s no problem cuz my dad just called him and he’s on his way.

fucking great.

i go upstairs, get on aim, which was probably a bad idea anyway since half my aim windows were trying to take my advantage of my state and telling me to go on a killing spree. My dad knocks on the door and says i gotta move my car to let the guys into the backyard. Great. At this point everything has that “drawn by crayon” look which makes backing my car out very very difficult.

Finally i fall asleep, which was really really hard since trying to fall asleep when everything is still hilarious, is well, difficult. At one point i was watching the christian channel, laughing at the priest, trying to sing along with his Latin chanting. Then i tried to fall asleep to some Senate hearings about tobacco lobbying, etc. That was even more funny.

Finally sweet sleep is acheived for 6 hours, now im back at the office, which has become my new apartment.

i hate myself and i want to die

Well it’s now been a week without power or internet access. Suicide seems like the path now, considering i’ve moved all the computers and anything of worth out of the apartment since i found out my area won’t get power until this weekend. That will make it a total of 2 weeks that i’ve been without power and the life giving Internet that comes with it.

I hope i have a nice funeral.

The checking account is dwindling since Internet access is kinda a requirement when making websites so im getting kinda worried about food money, gas money, rent money, etc. Since all of Memphis has been basically destroyed, any future clients i had my eyes on are now more worried about damage to their business, etc.

Dont spend a lot of money on flowers, etc.

This whole time i’ve slept on 4 different couches so far, spent lots of quality time with Marla and basically roamed around Memphis looking for new places to stay. This doesn’t sound unless you know that

a) my mp3 player doesn’t work because the assholes at Xtreme Auto fucked up my install.
b) my driver side window doesn’t roll up because Memphis has a really bad crime problem, this letting water pour in while i drive, another plus

Im not going to even mention the bald ass tires because hydroplanning really isn’t that bad if you have music but fuck….

This will probably be the last update for a while considering the vices that im now dealing with. God bless you all and next time you turn on a light, cook food, refridgerate food or anything involving electricity, think of me.


gawd was going through crackhore.com logs just a minute ago and realized that i was getting a huge amount of hits from Case Western Reserve University. I kept thinking, ugh, who do i know that lives in cleveland?

Then i remembered Christy telling me how many people she’s talked to up there about my site. So i’d like to give a huge shout out to my CWRU niggas up there.

how crackhore.com almost went away

besides me dying in a car wreck, drug overdose, etc, there isn’t much thats going to stop this site.

except when goddamn fucking network solutions.

I love the name too, the word network, which describes a bunch of computers and people all working together. Solutions, means a answer to something, providing a answer.

network solutions just provides questions.

i received my netsol notice that crackhore was going to expire in 4 months. My mom, who i guess doesn’t read this site at all, told me that she would gladly renew it for me. She sent off a check to netsol and i considered the matter happily closed until it expired again.

Suddenly, i start getting spam saying that my domain has expired, asking me if i’d like to re-register with their shitty ass registar, etc.

I call netsol up, tell them that they almost ruined my life, considering all the crackhore.com shirts and stickers i own, that my friends wear and have crackhore gear and stickers on their monitors
thanks justin 🙂

anyway, everything is okay now, domain and life saved, everything in it’s right place.