web fucking jesus

Yesterday was kinda fucked up, like truely a good day in what will soon be my short and lonely life. Started drinking Pabst at the deli at 11am with Levi who just got back from Iraq. Played i dunno how many games of pool, drank a lot, talked about everything from body armor to female Islamic snipers.

Ive been kind of on a bender lately because the web jesus life has been paying off and i’m actually feeling these little bursts of manic happiness. It’s all a act to hide how I’m really tearing myself up because of Valerie.  Last night poor Mary listened to me bitch and moan about whether or not i should leave my loving girlfriend.  Then i vaguely remember her shoving me down in the parking lot. It’s still early and Eric is online yet but i’m reallly going to have to get the details on that.

I can tell the end is pretty much around the corner, it’s been a fun.  I’ve had a really good time. Shouldn’t have drank so much.  Anniex0r called me at 3:45am this morning and left a message and after hearing it i can’t really tell you what she was calling for or what the message was “about”. I’m so glad i didn’t answer all drunk off import beer, depressed and manic, that would have been a conversation we both would have really regretted.

I should call her later. I take comfort in other people’s pain and you have to be in pain if you’re calling me drunk at 4am. I am a confirmed drunk dialer and i know what can be said and the damage that can be done. I’m sure she’s fine, but it’s how i still really worry about people, even when they are someone i should not be answering calls from. Like i can search this site for annie and see the torment and pain i’ve felt from that evil girl. I guess i can still worry about her.

She’s shaped me to the wonderful person i am today. < /sarcasm>

 Yeah so today i’m reallly going to start eating again. Food is so important, people. You can drink as much as you want but you really gotta eat or else the drinking will stop, and so will the fun breathing. I’m trying to figure out what i really wanna eat because it’s really important to really want what you’re eating when you havn’t done it in days.