mad beer ninja

yesterday i went to a redbirds game with shane and his friend. I’m wearing green cargo pants and a Buffalo Bills hoody. In memphis. In spring.

I meet them out friend and neither of them comment about being overdressed. We go inside, i try to barter a cup from the concession stand with no luck. We head up to the seats and as we’re going up the steps i turn to shane and say “yeah i think i’ve gotten pretty bad with alcohol lately”. Shane in turn tells me how much he drank the night before and kinda humbles me for a minute.

We sit down, i pull off the hoody, take out the 40 of Icehouse out of the pocket, placing the hoody back over the bottle as a sort of camo net and go in search of a cup.

$2.50 later i have a coke. I get back to the seat and realize im going to have to drink this fucking coke before i can have my beer. I get back up, find a bathroom, dump the coke and return. It’s already the 3rd inning.

Shane and his friend go to the concession stand and i sit there and pound cheap beer through a cardboard cup. The whole time there is a Redbirds employee eyeing me, often walking down and looking at my hoody. Shane and his friend still havn’t came back.

It starts raining, almost everyone leaves, i watch more of the game from under a roof. My poor 40 is nearly empty so i wander around looking for shane and calling him on his cellphone. They find my drunk ass, watch the rest of the game, which was basically over after the opposing team scored 5 runs in one inning, and we left.

In retrospect, i wish i had ate half a Halcion along with the 40 and drove down there but that could have easily led to toad waking up in his car the next morning.