smirnoff ice

i called my mom earlier and told her about the cool little dispensers that give out mouthwash. I told her how special i felt that fox and hound wanted to take care of me. She however told me that they provide the mouthwash for people who had ordered spicey foods. She said they have the same dispensers at Corkeys, which serve ribs. I dunno tho, sounds like bullshit to me.

2am.. probably should go to bed…early day at the office tommorow…have to be there by 10…i have 3 alarms set, maybe i’ll wake up…..really tempted to drink one of the smirnoff ice’s i bought for debbie that’s in the fridge……must…not…drink….gift….i’ll just have one…”to help me sleep”

ahh, Pint Nite eve. In less then 2 hours the great Monday ritual begins. I’ll drive down to the Flying Saucer, drink $2.50 pints of some exotic beer and stare at the beautiful waitresses. Theres nothing better then getting sloshed on $10 worth of beer and talking about kidnapping and molesting waitresses with the other Saucer patrons. But first i must finish a flowchart for a site…which requirse flow chart making music. I loaded up c:mp3sgay and was rewarded with Tiny Dancer by Elton John. The volume goes up so that the rest of my neighbers can hear Elton’s beautiful tender voice.

ugh, pint nite…..the drive home wasn’t as bad as previous nights…took the back roads home…didn’t kill anyone….there was a waitress at pint nite who had this huge black and blue mark on the back of her ankle. Everyone(since i wasn’t drinking alone yet) was wondering what it was. I assured everyone that it was a bruise from handcuffs that she often wore during sex. The next time she came back to our table, i asked our kindly waitress…her name was….started with a L…Liz! yes! it was Liz, so i asked our amazing waitress what the mark was on the back of her ankle. She pulled back the stocking and said “My shoes do this”. We all laugh and smile and i feel foolish. It looked like a bruise…they all believed me…

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