Scoutmastertoad

I am so absofuckinglutely tired. I drink a few cups of coffee, find out what exactly i need to do. Turns out me and my dad are basically running the starting line which means going up to every car that goes on the track, pressing down on the hood, making sure they closed their door and trunk properly. Nothing better […]

this is a open letter to ian, marla or anyone else who knows me, how to update my site after i’m dead. Step 1) Define topic. You really have only 2 topics. How girls are fucked up and no one is having sex with you. That is the easier topic. You also have the “our goverment is fucked” update, also […]

scoutmastertoad: it’s 3:20am, im drunk, been high all day, i got a access point for designing a website that had to do with greeting cards, i designed my dad a leet website for his company and i made a pretty pimp flyer for a club that said they would give me free drinks….fuck i spent more money then i made […]

Im sick of girls that are going through PMS. Bitching about “how tough it is to be a girl”. It can’t be any worse then being a guy. I’m serious, I go out maybe 3 nights a week. I see girls. I see girls that i want to cut, chop up, eat and serve on a nice plate with maybe […]

nothing better then getting a phone call on your cellphone at 7pm that’s work related. I need to get a home phone again and turn the evil cell phone off. At one point of the conversation she asked if i wanted her to call me back on another line. best part is tommorow she’s swinging by the office to talk.. […]

If you’re ever in a situation where you meet someone from the internet out of the blue, just follow these steps and you’ll be straight. 1) Never say “Wow i would have kept talking to you if i had known you were cute!” This is one sometimes slips out after a few drinks. 2) Do not instantly think that since […]

msg me at scoutmastertoad

In these series of updates, im going to explain to you llama ass bitches that don’t know how to pick up chicks at a bar. Cuz toad don’t play. Tonight i was strolling into young ave deli, just as i do every night that im fucking drunk and high. As i was walking in i made eye contact with this […]

another exciting night in memphis….the activities waiting the bored and tired are truely numerous and fun. First, we have alcohol. There are several bars that are having specials tonight. Pint night has it’s $2.50 pints…and the gas station always has it’s cheap 40’s. But since i’ve done the alcohol thing every night for oh, the past 2 years…..it even gets […]