Month: January 2006

I made my girlfriend try out her new waffle iron this morning. Syrup, butter, everything. Can’t remember the last time i even had a waffle.

We went and looked at places to move this afternoon. It’s kinda depressing looking at these townhouses with pools for $100 more then im paying a month. I still can’t wait to call my landlord and give her the final “hey you better get your maintenance guy back over here to fix this place cuz im going to fuck it up before i leave.”

The final straw here was when i failed to explain to someone about how shitty this place is. Of course it’s a gay couple. A interracial gay couple. No more fun.

I need to take a picture of these 2 plastic light up frogs they’ve put outside on the porch. Before, i was like “oh okay, a black dude and a white dude living together, just roommates, cool.” The lightup frogs tho, that was like “ohhhhh i get it 🙁 gay”. Now don’t get me wrong, i have NOTHING against gay people, or mac users. I just havn’t any good experiences living next to gay men. I’ve lived next to lesbians and they were the best neighbors ive ever had. It’s just living next to 2 gay, it’s just doesn’t lead to anything good. When 2 gay men begin to “nest” together, they take on a whole much meaner attitude then when 2 lesbians get together.

These are all generalities, i’m just sayin…
Continue reading waffles and interracial gay couples

i am such a fucking asshole

so a few days ago i see a car pull into the driveway of my duplex. and when i say my, i mean, i’ve been living here, in this roach infested, drafty, poorly wired shit hole, for 2-3 months without anyone living in the other part of the house. He looks like a nice guy. He’s unlocking the door to the apartment. Out comes toad, Dark Side Of The Moon blaring, stumbling. “dude, you havn’t signed a lease yet, have you?”. “No why.” I give him my sales pitch, asking him if he likes roaches, cuz some people like it…..he says he’s going to call her and back up.

just now a very very fine looking black woman pulled up in a beat up camry. Her name was L something. Anyway, i see her car pull up. I roll out the door, got the Homer slippers on, hoody and camo pants. I’ve perfected my sales pitch at this point. We talk for like 20 minutes about how she can do better then this apartment and how she needs to hit craigslist.com. She asks me if she can print from it. I tell her she can and she’ll find a much better place then this.

don’t you fuck with me. That’s right Annie, i’m taking you on. You’re not going to rent the rest of this place while i’m here. I’m not putting that on my conscience, letting someone move into this fucking butthole of a apartment. The apartment jesus has saved 2 people and will continue to warn people of the dangers of this duplex.

duplex jesus ftw.
Continue reading don’t fuck with me

went to the mall new years eve with merritt and valerie to buy my poor girlfriend her xmas present(5 days late?).

the mall is so great… alot of people hate the mall but seeing so many people and what they think is “cute mall clothes” is pretty priceless. It’s like a zoo, just point and whisper and wonder what it’s like to think a short skirt in january with a denim jacket and flipflops is hot. Maybe she’s just a girl version of toad and doesn’t care…i was wearing a hoody and camo pants.

new years party was out of control, going to write a full update when i get the rest of the pics…coming soon tho
Continue reading my name is a webdesigner named toad, like a tribe called quest