ugh

waking up at 2pm…mad voicemails and missed calls on phone…..went out drinking last night…the $30 bottle of jack daniels is almost empty…well, will be empty after i finish these next 2 drinks hehehe……

i’d like to give a shout out to Sly at the glass onion for the $7 tab he gave me. next time you go in there tell them toad sent ya

hmmm on a completely unrelated story i was really drunk the other night and i decided that i didn’t want to have those long hairs around my nipples anymore. taking a lighter off my desk, i burned all the hair off, thus making my nipples hard as rocks.

this update is spiralling out of control. better stop while im ahead…or something

can i help you

okay, im pulling out of my apartment around 11am this morning, on my way to my first meeting. I turn my car around in a driveway and notice a blue tercel park outside my apartment and watch some shady guy get out of the car and start taking pictures.

I drop my car into first, pull up next to the guy and ask “excuse, can i help you with anything?” and the guy calmly says “your landlord is putting up a ad in the newspaper for the place”. I look him up and down and say “okay, as long as you’re not with any goverment agency” and drive off.

yay im sane again

yay, i’d like to give a shout out to flexaril for being there last night when i couldn’t blink.

last night i lost total spacial awareness and depth perception. Then i went to my website meeting, trying to reteach myself out to talk.

but my substance abuse has nothing to do with what im updating for. by now you should have noticed if you’ve turned onto any website or tv, that our dear friend michael jackson has been raided.

when i first heard about it i laughed, clicked on the link and read. i’d like to admit to you all that i’m a little disappointed that a bunch of 13 yr olds with loin cloths and machine guns didn’t turn this into a Waco.

ranch sounds a lot like compound in my head.

best part is their saying it’s not for child “abuse”, they raided him for a “foreign exchange scandal”.

ugh could you imagine being one of the thousands of people that have to sift thru this guy’s huge ranch and theme park. bet they’re gonna find all kidns of goodies.

see the worst part is i kinda feel sorry for him. millions of blogs being updated talking about michael jackson and how he’s a pedophile, etc. you gotta wonder tho, what if he’s not touching kids(anymore?) and he’s just so blacklisted that he’s kind of a target…..

stand strong, mr jackson. i have been accused of stuff before, even a situation kinda like this…but i think i’ll save that for another update cuz now it’s time to get some michael jackson mp3s

back to the computers

hmmm back to the computers…….i wander away for a few minutes and Brooks, wearing a crackhore.com shirt, starts talking about how saw demons….definetely not happy…..

i really hate how one computer says it’s 2:45pm when it’s 4:49pm on the other monitor. Okay, fixed that. Anyway, where was i…..ugh aim keeps sucking me away from this update….mmmmmmm aim…….ive started to feel as if, something im trying to remember from a dream………….YES! THE KING OF DRUGS HAS RETURNED!

i got a little black book with my code in
god a bacasdfasdfmsfg

uh oh

i woke up around 10pm….pretty good for me, sat at computers a few hours…didn’t get high…was pretty proud of myself…..then my friend lizzy from new orleans calls me and asks if i’ll hangout with her friend who’s in town.

for some strange reason, instead of wake and baking, i eat a chocolate shroom fish and drink 2 Coors on the way downtown to her hotel. This was probably not the wiset plan in retrospect.

now i hide my drugs well and the 2 beers kinda chilled me out enough to not really go completely crazy while driving her to the blue monkey. We play pool, i somehow win, over drinks, when her friend she’s sharing the hotel with. I drive her back downtown, shrooms coming on even harder at this point and somehow manage to drive home.

I get home and the drugs have definetely kicked in. Ian’s girlfriend has left her dog here, the tiny little weiner dog you’ve probably seen on this site before. YEah, kinda fucked up while tripping, i agree.

Then ian gets home with Brooks. Ian has bought a TV and tells me to put on my shoes cuz i gotta help him move it. Nothing like some physical labor to get the shrooms going.

going to go now

update later

weheee

site sucks so bad, hate everyone who reads it.

i’d like to give a shout out to unisom for all the hours like this i’ve had. driving home thru the fog, drunk and pilled out, blaring the wall. thats what drugs were made for.

hate this site and hate you for reading it

no i don’t

*cheers*

till tommorow

this updated sponsored by rite aide sleep gels and smirnoff vodka

im finishing the rest of the 52oz cup of vodka/cranberry….starting to wonder if you can leave cranberry juice sitting out for 2 days fermenting with the vodka.

yet another wasted day in my wasted life. i really need to get better at making websites because i don’t want to be making the sites im making now, this time next year.

tommorow is thursday. the phone will ring with angry people. stab stab stab stab stab gawd kill kill kill roar aroaralsdhfkahlalkshdfasdfasdfasdf