outsourced

hola, me lamo hector.

toad cannot work on his site no more so i update for him. white master dictate to me while i type and he wine sleep on carpet. white master toad had mucho good time lately drinking. he mucho miss his old drinking buddy.

hector’s job is to add pics to white master toad’s site soon. i learn english really well and make good updates for white master toad. this is much better then gutting houses.

i’m not getting paid as much tho.

i can has update?

nutrition and diet have came up in my life a lot lately. it’s like i can live expensive and eat well or eat processed death and know im doing more damage to myself then the daily daiquiris, wine, etc.

i’m so behind on this site. no red dress pics, no pics of nothing. im going to hire a mexican to copy pics from my camera, make witty comments and submit.  i’m too busy to have a good site.

i don’t like being responsible. i can’t wait to quit and sell.

photoshop

nothing like photoshoping a co-workers face onto mr rogers and printing out lots of color copies for everyone. i’m glad i get to use my god given talents for worthwhile projects.

he deserved it tho. he made fun of our pregnant co-worker’s feet and she said he looked like mr rogers with his sweater. she shows up in my cube with a pic of him and asks if i can make some magic.

it was creepy how good it turned out.

we took it a step further. the husband of the pregnant woman comes up and gives me props but says “okay, take his sweater, turn it dark red, and put the university of Alabama logo on it”.

This is when it gets out of control. Management starts printing it out and hanging it up in their cubes. Co-workers who got the original email start forwarding it to other former coworkers and friends outside of the network, who start printing it out and hanging it up.

Feels good to make a difference.

red dress run

Look i got pics from this event…43 of them actually, on the other computer, too late to get up, will add soon.

So they have this charity running event called the red dress run. Apparently this goes on all over the country. Bunch of people, and i’m talking a lot of people, run from bar to bar all dressed in…you guessed it.

I have been really excited about this event. Minh bought me my dress at the salvation army when he picked his up. I went as far as put it on over my clothes at work and did a lap around our floor. People weren’t feeling it at all.

So the day finally arrives and i put on my dress.

We get downtown right at the start, so close that minh let me park his car while he registered(yeah lol wtf)

We get there and im blown away by how many people are there. I get my wristband that says i registered and head to the many kegs. I only get a beer and a half in me before we’re off to the next bar. I have a huge problem running because i’m laughing so hard watching this mob run down canal. Watching Minh dodge in and out of people running with his sun glasses and a serious look on his face almost makes me have a heart attack and we finally get to the first bar(good friends lol). This time since we ran we’re early. We walk up to the huge truck full of beer. I think i drank 3 here before it’s time to go again.

The whistle blows and people start stumbling to the next bar. More beer. Oh this bar has pizza! That’s exactly what sounds good on this 110 degree heat beer run. I have a piece of pepperoni. I can’t resist free food 🙁

We head off to the next bar. I can’t for the life of me remember how many bars we ran to, in what order.  On the way to the last bar i’m yelling “i think the pizza is coming back to say hi :(“. I keep it down tho. I figured it’s part of the challenge. I’m going all out, ive been drinking and running a lot and doing them both at the same time feels great!

We finally get to the riverwalk pavallion where they have another “really bad thing to consume while running”. Cooler after cooler of jello shots. I’m reaching in to get my 2nd or 3rd when someone walks up and pours in a huge bag of them. Like out of some sick alcoholic fairy tell, the magical jello shot cooler.

I have 1-2 more beers, attempt to socialize and leave. I walk the entire length of the quarter and eventually call a cab. I think i called a cab. Santa and his reindeer could have gave me a ride back to Horetilly for all i know.

I woke up the next morning and my pretty red dress is in a pile next to my computer and a mostly empty cup of beer. I must drink and run a lot more this season to prepare. I think i’m going to try to go to more of this group’s events as well.

lizzylist

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