Month: February 2003

that was so awesome@#$@#

ive been trying to teach marla how to close the backdoor on command. This way i can let her out, leave the door kinda cracked, she can push the door open and come in.

But when it’s fucking 20 degrees outside and your freezing your ass off cuz you can’t get up from your game cuz theres a hero in your peon line, it sucks.

So lately ive been trying to teach Marla to close the door on command. She almost had it yesterday but just kept getting too excited at being able to do something that involves jumping up.

I just let her back in just now and she did it! hahalkdhfalhdfh next im gonna teach her to make a gin and tonic or pack a bowl.

hmmm this is how a lot of my dates go….i go over to house, she cooks, we drink, i’m charming, she falls asleep, i finish the rest of the bottle of wine while she’s asleep in her bed.

i load up the java aim, download 2-3 mp3s to listen to while finishing the wine, talk on aim, update my site in a drunken merlot haze and drive home

YOU MAKE ME HARD
WHEN IM ALL SOFT INSIDE
I SEE THE TRUTH
WHEN IM ALL STUPID EYED
YOUUUU GO STRAIGHT TO MY HEART

WITHOUT YOU EVERYTHING FALLS APART

The daytime, non-drowsy, congested-stuffy head, sore throat, coughing, aching fever so you can get through the website medicine.

ian: don’t you think you should stop smoking while sick?
toad: yeah i think theres a lot of things i should stop doing while sick

No matter how formidable people may be in real life, the moment they try to mess with ScoutMasterToad, they are sure to get the horns.

Almost got in a car wreck on the way home today cuz i was busying staring at a girl in a honda with a Nirvana and Pink Floyd sticker on her bumper. Any girl that’s into that has to be cool right?

I memorized her face so next time i see her i’ll be able to have a really errie pick up line to use on her.

A little part of my day is always occupied with some sublime directory with the latest in amaetur, good ole fashioned internet pr0n. It's great, no matter how my day has been, i can always look forward to seeing some new naked girls.

Since this is something i don't really need to do everyday, i then start to think of it as a addiction.

Toad knows addiction.

I think I attribute most of my porn addiction to my all male high school days. Going weeks without seeing a member of the opposite sex, except at gas stations and stop lights. So i had a steady diet of porn at a impressionable age.

Losing my virginity probably didn't help the whole situation. Now that i knew what they felt like it, porn seemed even greater. I've also noticed that my porn intake doubles in the winter. I dunno if it's seasonal depression or what but it starts to get kinda weird.

Oh well, until i wake up one morning with guys in ski masks and US flags on their bullet proof vests, i'm definetely sure porn is my favorite addiction.

i can’t stand that ozzy is doing fucking pepsi commercials…it’s not like you weren’t already filthy fucking rich from your music and then you get this MTV thing but now you’re sucking on the same dick that brittany had just wrapped her little lips around.

and don’t get me started about your ugly ass no talented daughter and your fat son who’s never worked a day in his fucking life. Yeah im talking to you fucker, you with the pepsi lemon in your mouth.

those words echoed through my poor hungover body at 12:30 this morning……fucking ian, this is all his fault…..after watching a especially bloody episode of Oz and 3 glasses of wine later, im at Old School Sunday, the only white person there who isn’t working there…..

i remember at one point Andy the bartender looked me square in the eyes after he poured me my next gin and tonic and said “i’m gonna get you sick tonight”.

thats not something you want your bartender to tell you..

after several more bars and several more drinks, toad cuts himself off. Now it’s fucking 1pm, i’m still kinda drunk, going to the office wearing the same clothes i wore last night…and slept in come to think of it..

just another sunday in the wall

WELL SHE MAY NOT LOOK LIKE OTHER GIRLS!@$#@!#$@#$@

seeeeeeether@#$@#$@# hhahaa

gawd this is when music ruled…..veruca salt in bud light commercials….fucking ruled…i tried to keep her on a short lease, i tried to calm her down, i tried to ram her into the……….ground@#$@#$

i think the worst part about tonight was coming home from my parent’s house all drunk then having my really good friend saying “hey you’re gonna wake up hungover tommorow”. It was a terrible feeling, thinking “yup, going to wake up feeling shitty and fucked up”

blah

SCOUTmasterTOAD: too much alcohol consumed tonight 🙁
SCOUTmasterTOAD: monday = hungover