into great website hosting

Toadie waited till he finished high school
He went to Pasadena, got a laptop
He met a girl out there with a laptop too
The future was wide open

He moved into a placee he couldn’t afford
He found a church that needed a site
He setup paypal and taught them some html
The sky was the limit

Into great web hosting,
Under them skies of Pabst
Out in great web hosting,
A rebel without a host

The About us said hed always designed from the heart
He got an secretary and a 40 named pabst
They made some websites and it went in the network
T he sky was the limit

His hawaiian shirt had stains that would sicken
They both met rap stars, partied and mingled
Their police man said I don?t see insuranceBR>
The future was wide open

Into great web hosting,
Under them skies of Pabst
Out in great web hosting,
A rebel without a host

Into great web hosting,
Under them skies of Pabst
Out in great web hosting,
A rebel without a host

Continue reading into great website hosting

professor toad teaches webdesign 101

i was out at a bar a few weeks ago, (surprise) after a meeting. A guy i know from back when i used to go out a lot, comes up to me and asks if i’ll tutor his sister and her friend in their webdesign course they have in college.

I say sure, why not. I’ve learned any chance to help someone out usually ends in me getting some real web work. They also offer me alcohol, which i have also learned…makes updates.

We met last night and i was dressed really nice, had my shirt with my business’s name on it, didn’t say anything weird, etc. We met at their very nice apartment, very very clean.

We had to have class #2 at my apartment since i don’t have a rental yet.

Now you have to picture my apartment with all the weird shit on the walls, stolen shit, etc. But it’s really messy after the weekend. I have a martini shaker on my computer desk, next to my huge black survival knife.

A little about my appearance. Hair is like orange blonde, got the hawaiian shirt on, camo pants, no socks. I can’t remember what terrible music i had playing because i had been drinking since like 4pm.

I finish her project, i vaguely remember showing her photoshop. I dunno, can’t remember, too drunk.

Continue reading professor toad teaches webdesign 101

you cannot kill the elephant

*puts on portishead album*
*pours glass of whiskey*

so i almost died tonight. was driving through north parkway and poplar….light turns red….we’re listening to the widow on mars volta’s 2nd album…..BAM*spin*spin*spin*grass*median*

we’re hit by this poor(but insured) girl. 5 police cars show up. i strip my car of it’s wordly possessions, ie the radar detector, stereo, blanket, etc and 2 hours later a cop drives me home.

i’m not taking this that bad. as a cancer i know, these are the risks of leaving my apartment/shell. people run red lights….at least i wasn’t going 3mph faster or else she would have hit my passenger side door, shattering glass into my face and probably breaking my mouse arm.

i seriously almost cried watching them tow my del sol onto the back of the tow truck. the car that symbolized my fate in humanity, smashed by it.

ugh i keep fading into real bitterness that my somewhat perfect life is now a jail then back to “wow i’m so glad i have my arms and legs” and “im glad the girl that hit me isn’t bleeding on her dashboard with a rain poncho covering her”.

good thing i work from home.

when the cop was giving me a ride home, we see the tow truck at the exxon with my poor car, bleeding on the back. The tears start to well up again. You’ve been a good car, del sol. The direct hit nailed my back axle, so the frame/etc might be bent, thus owning my car totally.

Kelley says a 95 del sol is worth about 5 grand. So worst case scenario, i get 5k to build a new del sol. Things are not as bad as i want them to be?

I left a terminally ill friend of mine’s house before the wreck. If i had stayed for 2 more seconds to comfort him then maybe the universe wouldn’t have thrown this into the mix…..see it’s this kind of thought that we need to evolve past….everything doesn’t happen for a reason…it’s called random for a reason…

long rant short, i’m alive, car can probably be fixed, if not we rebuild. The Chinese have the same word for opportunity as crisis. I have the beer my girlfriend left me monday.

Everyone get drunk tonight cuz I’m still not dead. I got hit by a Explorer going 30ish in a fucking del sol, the go-cart of the civic line, and lived, again.

get in my way now.
Continue reading you cannot kill the elephant

NIN In Nashville 2005 rawr

This Halloween Valerie and i went to see NIN/Queens Of Stoneage in Nashville. A lot of people have asked why we didn’t just see them at the voodoofest they had in Memphis. Basically, we’re real fans of them and didn’t want to see a chopped up set, in a baseball stadium, with 2 stages back to bed. I want to see NIN with a real sound system, real lights in a real venue. < /rant>

After a uneventful but alcohol filled drive to Nashville, we get to our hotel, drink the rest of the beer and pass out. We wake up, head to the venue and grab some BBQ. I don’t know why we decided to try out nashville bbq, i dunno, thought there might be something. Getting BBQ in another city after living in Memphis is like a weed smoker from Amsterdam scoring a dime bag on Southern Ave. Sure, you guys might love it but it’s probably not shit.

We have floor seats, so we get there 2 hours early. It’s cold as fuck, i’m sporting the hoody, 2 layers of clothes, completely warm. Valerie has on basically the opposite. We sit down the ground and talk about how we can’t believe we’re about to see NIN.

When in line at concerts, it’s like a darwinian rule that you’ll meet someone cool. You’re already at a NIN concert, everyone already has a level of okayness since they are there. We finally strike up a conversation with the group next to us. This really sucks that i can’t remember the names of the 2 other guys with them, and they have stickers so they’ll read this and feel bad. Then again they watched me drink so they know i have the short term memory of a fucking doorstop.

Anyway, the couple with them, Katie and Foster(my sister’s name is katy and foster is beer, name tricks ftw). In every conversation i have with people, i usually have a timer counting down to “okay, save to give them crackhore.com stickers.” I say “well, let me get this out of the way” and reach for them when Katie screams “omg you have stickers, i have stickers too!” and hands me 2 black stickers for her site.

Squeeky-Chan.com

We both exchange stickers, several hours of conversation with them ranging from the homeless olympics and timing each other when one group would rule to bathroom, etc. We are accepted into their herd and follow them throughout the evening. I hope they are reading this.

I want to also give a paragraph to Katie for her site. Donate some money to her. This is what the internet is all about. Hot girls and their cameras. I feel so lame giving her a crackhore sticker after looking at her site. “yeah my site is um, about hangovers and drinking…oh wow you got naked pics, nice…*sigh*”

We get into the show, take our seats about 6 feet from the stage. This is going to own. A band called Death From 1979 opened for queens of the stoneage. Drummer and bassist, drummer singing. Had potential but ugh.

Queens of the stoneage roll out on stage. They play a good mix of their old stuff and new stuff, but most importantly they played Someone’s In The Wolf.

Hearing that song live has completed my existance. I really am glad i went to nashville to hear a full set of queens of the stoneage simply for the reason that they would add “extra shit” for a live set that would go on for like 45 seconds – 1 minute. You’re following them down this crazy guitar solo they dropped in the middle of this track, a minute later your like “oh lol thats right, it’s that song, i forgot, wtf”.

It’s going to be hard to sum up the NIN experience without the track list. It started out pretty rough on the floor during March Of The Pigs. Was slightly worried that my girlfriend was going to be maimed or killed during anything from Broken. The crowd kinda sorted itself out in regular mosh fashion. When someone got out of control, everyone would put the karma elbow into the guy’s kidneys and go on. What really made my night was Reptile, Burn and Suck. All that was missing was The Perfect Drug and it would have been it.

I really have to respect Reznor for dropping in Eraser then Right Where It Belongs after 2 Broken tracks, complete with the Iraq war/Bush dancing, ants and insects stock photography.

They played well over a hour, song after song until the end where he drags out the little keyboard and plays Hurt. Everyone thinks the concert is over after this.

Head like a Hole comes screaming on. Guitars smashed on the stage and thrown into the crowd. Our crowd. A huge angry chunk of Trent’s guitar flys to the left of the stage. Katy and Foster grab it, along with one other guy who wrestles it away. They were that close. Fucking sucks. I should have taken a picture of their cut up hands and the splinters Foster got.

After the show as we’re shuffling out, Valerie finds a guitar pick and i found a Salvation Army watch that will probably be someone’s christmas present. Nashville cops hassle us out of the venue.

I’d like to take a paragraph to say something, even tho anyone this could possibly effect doesn’t read this site. Pushing around kids in black now that you are a adult and have a yellow security shirt still makes your cock the same size. Measure it. If we move from a certain spot where we agreed to meet our friends, you make us liars. We also won’t be able to find them, since they will come back to the spot we’re not at anymore. Do i need to draw you stick figures? It seems so simple to me. Sure, you gotta close the building down but do we need to give you the same excuse over and over?

Wow back in memphis after a tall boy and a few cigarettes. Feels so good to be back on computers.

Word to Katy and Foster’s crew. You guys ever want to come slum it up in Memphis, msg/call.
Continue reading NIN In Nashville 2005 rawr

NIN in Nashville

This Halloween Valerie and i went to see NIN/Queens Of Stoneage in Nashville. A lot of people have asked why we didn’t just see them at the voodoofest they had in Memphis. Basically, we’re real fans of them and didn’t want to see a chopped up set, in a baseball stadium, with 2 stages back to bed. I want to see NIN with a real sound system, real lights in a real venue. < /rant>

After a uneventful but alcohol filled drive to Nashville, we get to our hotel, drink the rest of the beer and pass out. We wake up, head to the venue and grab some BBQ. I don’t know why we decided to try out nashville bbq, i dunno, thought there might be something. Getting BBQ in another city after living in Memphis is like a weed smoker from Amsterdam scoring a dime bag on Southern Ave. Sure, you guys might love it but it’s probably not shit.

We have floor seats, so we get there 2 hours early. It’s cold as fuck, i’m sporting the hoody, 2 layers of clothes, completely warm. Valerie has on basically the opposite. We sit down the ground and talk about how we can’t believe we’re about to see NIN.

When in line at concerts, it’s like a darwinian rule that you’ll meet someone cool. You’re already at a NIN concert, everyone already has a level of okayness since they are there. We finally strike up a conversation with the group next to us. This really sucks that i can’t remember the names of the 2 other guys with them, and they have stickers so they’ll read this and feel bad. Then again they watched me drink so they know i have the short term memory of a fucking doorstop.

Anyway, the couple with them, Katy and Foster(my sister’s name is katy and foster is beer, name tricks ftw). In every conversation i have with people, i usually have a timer counting down to “okay, save to give them crackhore.com stickers.” I say “well, let me get this out of the way” and reach for them when Katy screams “omg you have stickers, i have stickers too!” and hands me 2 black stickers for her site.

Squeeky-Chan.com

We both exchange stickers, several hours of conversation with them ranging from the homeless olympics and timing each other when one group would rule to bathroom, etc. We are accepted into their herd and follow them throughout the evening. I hope they are reading this.

We get into the show, take our seats about 6 feet from the stage. This is going to own. A band called Death From 1979 opened for queens of the stoneage. Drummer and bassist, drummer singing. Had potential but ugh.

Queens of the stoneage roll out on stage. They play a good mix of their old stuff and new stuff, but most importantly they played Someone’s In The Wolf.

Hearing that song live has completed my existance. I really am glad i went to nashville to hear a full set of queens of the stoneage simply for the reason that they would add “extra shit” for a live set that would go on for like 45 seconds – 1 minute. You’re following them down this crazy guitar solo they dropped in the middle of this track, a minute later your like “oh lol thats right, it’s that song, i forgot, wtf”.

It’s going to be hard to sum up the NIN experience without the track list. It started out pretty rough on the floor during March Of The Pigs. Was slightly worried that my girlfriend was going to be maimed or killed during anything from Broken. The crowd kinda sorted itself out in regular mosh fashion. When someone got out of control, everyone would put the karma elbow into the guy’s kidneys and go on. What really made my night was Reptile, Burn and Suck. All that was missing was The Perfect Drug and it would have been it.

I really have to respect Reznor for dropping in Eraser then Right Where It Belongs after 2 Broken tracks, complete with the Iraq war/Bush dancing, ants and insects stock photography.

They played well over a hour, song after song until the end where he drags out the little keyboard and plays Hurt. Everyone thinks the concert is over after this.

Head like a Hole comes screaming on. Guitars smashed on the stage and thrown into the crowd. Our crowd. A huge angry chunk of Trent’s guitar flys to the left of the stage. Katy and Foster grab it, along with one other guy who wrestles it away. They were that close. Fucking sucks. I should have taken a picture of their cut up hands and the splinters Foster got.

After the show as we’re shuffling out, Valerie finds a guitar pick and i found a Salvation Army watch that will probably be someone’s christmas present. Nashville cops hassle us out of the venue.

I’d like to take a paragraph to say something, even tho anyone this could possibly effect doesn’t read this site. Pushing around kids in black now that you are a adult and have a yellow security shirt still makes your cock the same size. Measure it. If we move from a certain spot where we agreed to meet our friends, you make us liars. We also won’t be able to find them, since they will come back to the spot we’re not at anymore. Do i need to draw you stick figures? It seems so simple to me. Sure, you gotta close the building down but do we need to give you the same excuse over and over?

Wow back in memphis after a tall boy and a few cigarettes. Feels so good to be back on computers.

Word to Katy and Foster’s crew. You guys ever want to come slum it up in Memphis, msg/call.
Continue reading NIN in Nashville