Your loving Levi.

We got a new cherry (guy that is new to the army and not been in combat) so I decided to take him out drinking one night. We went  to my buddy Dan’s house to consume copious amounts of alcohol and succeeded by far. I had the usual 18 beers or so, along with a shit-load of Jagermeister and some other things that I don’t fully remember. The cherry hadn’t been much of a drinker before this night and seemed to over do it a bit. He ended up falling over outside, while trying to vomit, and rolling around in the 35 degree rain for about 10 minutes… so i proceeded to take him upstairs to the indoor vomit hole. He then decided that he hates toilets with a passion and pukes all over the floor… giving me flashbacks of the deli and the ash tray incident. Then he states “I need to shit” but seems to forget with his next few heaves. I forget completely about the statement until about 10 minutes pass… and I smell something a bit like shit. Come to find out he has shit his pants right there in front of me. I don’t mean shart… or even a log or two…. but about a liter of curdled choco milky substance spewing down his legs and soaking thru his shorts…. I spent the next hour or so tossing him in the shower and stripping him down… trying to use the shower-head to clean him… waving it to and fro like a lawn sprinkler. Jesus I love the army…. there isn’t another place you will find a guy that will clean up your “shit”. The attached URL is the pic I took with my phone. Enjoy and feel free to post 😉

Your loving Levi.