been busy

so i’m pretty much settled into this new life…the goverment is no longer giving me huge checks to sit in a cubicle…i am unleashed into the world of freelancing again.

kelly has helped me clean up my proposals…former co-workers from the .mil have gotten me new website contracts to work on, things are going to be okay. the universe has turned several times and said “oh hey toad, u needs some work? you has it”.

everyday is a panic rush to do as much, bill as much, configure and set up as much. and i love it more then life itself.

when i am tired, i sleep, when i am motivated, i work.

no cubicle, no more happy face.

the only thing that sucks is i’m still not working out as much as i want…i’m running every other day and i’m ready for the crescent city classic but it’s sick how tied a man’s ego is to his biceps…once you’ve been in really good shape it sucks to get skinny again…i need to focus tho…the crescent city is around the corner…6.2 miles of pain and suffering….i wanted to pussy out and just not run it but my parents are coming in town and my dad wants to run the race with me…no way i can fag out on that. then a week later minh my old running buddy calls and says he’s coming in town for the race.

i gotta cut back on the smoking.

yesterday i ran in audobon park about 7pm with the downward spiral on the ipod. nothing like running in pitch dark hearing ERASE ME!!!!!!!!!!!! pretty decent run…i never thought years ago i would be listening to this dark ass music running through the park waiting to get killed. sometimes i wonder if it’s just a really subtle suicide attempt, running in the park after sunset…everyone at my funeral like “yah he died doing what he loved, running to depressing music” instead of “yah he drank himself to death, he died what he loved, hating everything”.

my biggest fantasy is to be running to the park and get hit by a drunk driver and killed instantly. bitches be loling at my funeral like “wait what, he died, running? hit by a drunk driver? wait is this the right funeral, i thinks i gotta be the funeral next to this one”

things are getting better, very much closer to being complete as a freelancer…the time it’s taken me to install the tools of the trade, set everything back up, proposal templates to be rebuilt…i feel 19 again. peter and anne have been very helpful.

thank god for good people.
and everyone who is following nip/tuck…wow heh

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