Category: TOAD NEWS FEED

i always feel a urge to update after going to court to pay speeding tickets…it’s almost worth the court costs just to be able to stand in line and force everyone around me to talk to me….after 20 minutes in any line in the south you’re gonna start having a conversation…it’s inevitable…

i woke up around 7:45 this morning…a ex girlfriend laying in bed with me…..after having sex, smoking a little pot, i get up, rush into the shower and off to court we go…again…

as i drive to court i realize that a lot of black people are doing exactly what i’ve been doing the past 24 hours. There were hundreds of black people in hard rock last night old school sunday, they all probably went home, like me, drank more, etc and woke up next to a ex girlfriend….

then they had to wake up, just like me, still all fucked up, put on some nice clothes and roll on down to 201 poplar. I go through security, go to district III and see the huge line. I’m still really fucked up at this point and in a really manic kind of mood so i’m just waiting for the chance to talk to anyone.

I end up talking with the old black woman behind me and the gangsta looking brother in front of me. The white guy behind the old woman turns up every once in a while and then turns away, like if to say “not happy” in a subliminal way…

Anyway, i’m one of those people that is too damn friendly for his own good. I used to love taking the train to new orleans cuz i would always have one meal where i would be really drunk and get to force 3 people to have a meal with me.

I love human interaction.

We all start talking about why we’re down there. The lady behind me was pulled over and given a $175 ticket cuz she didn’t have any liscense plates on her car. She just bought the car, was driving it home, gets pulled over and gets a ticket. Sure, she’ll get it dismissed but she had to get up at fucking 8am to do it.

This pisses me off. I’m already high as hell, really really manic and really really upset about our goverment. We continue talking, i keep making vague threats to our goverment, the guy in front of me laughs hysterically when i told him i was at old school last night.

We keep talking, the old woman keeps lecturing me about how i need to not speed and save my money, i keep laughing and talking about how it’s not my lifestyle to drive the speed limit… the guy in front of me, all Fubu’d out with a gold chain and his girl with him are dying laughing and almost everyone in line is turning to look at us…i can’t even describe how funny it was..

i go up to the judge, plead not guilty, walk out with court costs, pay my court costs from the last ticket, make a joke to the lady asking if i can get a bulk rate…she doesn’t laugh…i go home….

lalalalala *turns up tori*

right on, you get closer, and closer………..
lalala

called my name

theres no one here…lalala boys on my left side, boys on my right and your not here………..

lalalalallaa court in 7 hours……wheeeeeeeeee

Ian told me today, at 6pm, when we were both awake, that “Meathead”, a HUGE black man of height that i can’t even begin to describe in simple text. Sometimes he sneaks up behind me at the bar and just stands behind me until i turn around to face his stomach. Then he picks me up a little and we both start laughing and i tell him to watch out cuz i might throw up.

Old school sunday. Where you are the minority.

This week im gonna wear my 107.1 shirt again and definetely gonna bring a camera to get a shot of Meathead wearing his crackhore.com shirt. The first time i gave it to him, he put it on, i got 3 hilarious pictures of the tallest black man i’ve ever, dancing around with a drink in both hand blazing a crackhore t.

A stream of urine was running down my pants from laughter.

Time to get some food, get some beer and get back in the car….

i fucking hate when people ask me that…..how i am doing is completely up to your ideas of good and bad. I can say i’m doing great but you may take another glance at my life and say it’s tumbling out of control..

i always respond “i can’t complain”. Because honestly, if you’re breathing, you can’t, you’re not allowed to complain. So i shrug and say i can’t complain. I’m alive, i have a place to live, i have invoices out….i’ll probably live another year….there seriously isn’t a thing i can complain about….

i still look at people like a deer in headlights when they ask “how i’ve been doing”. This isn’t a new problem….i remember talking to therapists in highschool about how it bothered me that people would give out this small sense of sympathy yet keep it so formal….it really bothered me and i never could express why….

From now on when i run into someone i havn’t seen in a few months and they ask how i’ve been, i’m going to say “fucking amazing. Cuz quite honestly, i ate twice today, had some beer, hungout with a incredibly sexy girl, drove home and saw the sun come up. It’s been amazing.

I am doing amazing.

So are you.

7am….should i…

a) eat some food left in the fridge
b) smoke pot
c) all of the above…

ever since we got that coffee maker…ive discovered a kind of freedom….sleep is for the weak….3-4 hours, a few times a day is plenty enough…..benjamin franklin agreed…

get in memphis’s way now

WASHINGTON (CNN) — The nephew of Pakistani President Pervez Musharraf was arrested in the United States on February 19 on a charge of having an expired visa, a spokesman for the Bureau of Immigration and Customs Enforcement told CNN.

He was released Friday but could be deported after a hearing before an immigration judge, the spokesman said.

The nephew, Amir Javed Musharraf, registered with immigration authorities February 19 as part of a Justice Department program requiring men from 25 countries, including Pakistan, to be interviewed and fingerprinted.

Musharraf, who was living in Memphis, Tennessee, had been in the United

holy shit, everything works…horeboard, horestore, everything is running at optimal performance…..go ahead and sign up for the horeboard while i create more topics….if you have any ideas mail me

our president is going to get us all fucking killed.

i’m not a pessimist..i just read the news…..i mean is anyone else just the tiny bit scared about this whole situation? Sure, we’ll invade iraq in a few weeks, have to garrison the entire fucking country, probably take massive casualities for some weapons we think might be there.

we know the oil is there tho *wink*

it’s so transparent it’s laughable. Lets add this all together…our oil stock owning president…wants to invade a country with…surprise… a lot of oil…..that…wait, his father tried to invade a decade earlier? Okay, i think i get it.

It bothers me that my tax money is going to kill people. I don’t want to kill anyone, i’m a nice guy. I’m convinced terrorists arn’t out to kill people like me. But when those nukes launch from north korea and the coat hanger and duct tape missle defense seystem misses, it’s good bye seattle….

I think ive been listening to too much system of a down but i’m really getting kinda nervous about this whole war thing. The “with us or against us” thing is what starts world wars. Are you ready to go through another world war?

*keeps screaming but is muffled out by the volume of Friends*

ugh…7 days on wagon and bam….just chilling on the back of the wagon, talking to myself about how i don’t need alcohol to have fun, then bam….

tanya was telling me i wasn’t going to be able to only have 2-3 beers and leave. fucking bitch was right. ugh…mad drunk……..worst part is the other toad is smiling and saying…ya know toad…it’s only 4am..a little bitch might quit drinking now but you dont play…you can just stay up drinking….sleep and food is for the weak….

i was just getting back to eating food and sleeping during the night and had to go fuck it all up. gotta be up, sober, shaven and ready to work in 4 hours…..4 hours….think of all the living i could do in those 4 hours im going to waste in my bed, laying on my stomach, thinking about girls and dreading work….

they love us for the kingston souuuuuunddddd

ugh wanted to update about something but can’t remember now….fuck…i was in the car…driving home…and i thought of something that was really funny and said to myself “oh well, you’ll remember it by the time you get home”

gone.

ugh, now this update is going even farther down the spiral. hmm lets quit while i’m ahead…or behind….