Month: September 2003

ain’t nuthin to eat out

scoutMASTERtoad: i think the problem was she wasn’t kinky enough
scoutMASTERtoad: i need a fucked up bitch
FloTekSek: yah, like im usualy barely done the first time and im already losing interest
FloTekSek: what you mean not kinky enough?
FloTekSek: she suck dick?
scoutMASTERtoad: yah but like
scoutMASTERtoad: she’s the only girl who actually said like a few days later and was kinda generally pissed that i kinda forgot to eat her out one night
scoutMASTERtoad: and we all know why nobody is aching to eat that
scoutMASTERtoad: ugh i need another bowl after that hold on
FloTekSek: lol
FloTekSek: rofl
scoutMASTERtoad: can almost see it again
FloTekSek: god
scoutMASTERtoad: i mean it wasn’t super hairy but fuck
FloTekSek: rofl
FloTekSek: damn dood
scoutMASTERtoad: about 3 centuries ago they made this thing called scissors
scoutMASTERtoad: and you can fucking use it
scoutMASTERtoad: god
FloTekSek: lol
FloTekSek: rofl
scoutMASTERtoad: yah pasting that on site hold on
FloTekSek: noooo
FloTekSek: lol

woke up this morning and i had myself a beer

kind of drunk, ignore grammer mistakes.

ugh need to make a static gif on the homepage that says that.

anyway……

was meeting andy “daterape” madewell and ian for dinner at outback last night. We know a waiter there and he got me thinking about it so we went. they get there before me and i call them to tell me im my way. i tell andy to order me a beer ahead of time. i walk in, look drunkingly around for my roomate and the hostess asks me if i’m meeting people. I tell her i’m looking for 2 gay looking guys, she stares at me with a half smile laugh and i go “oh there they are” and sit down to my beer.

a fucking awesome steak later, i drive andy to bartlett and pick up valerie on the way. it’s hard to not call valerie my girlfriend and we havn’t had that talk yet, probably since i mentioned it on my site….but we drive andy back to barlett and val and i mix evan and cokes for the drive back.

I’m laughing in aim windows right now because im talking about how i can’t remember how this update ends, while i type it. We visit mr Andy George, pretty sure we drank when we go tthere, i remember laughing a lot.

ugh not sure how to end this cuz i remember driving down the middle of Central blaring the doors and it just fades after that.

gotta update about this

so yesterday before i go to kaleb’s bbq, i decide to stop in and get my haircut at the good ole Fantastic Sam’s i usually go to. I sit and wait for what seems like hours, reading a great article in GQ about Johnny Depp, how he likes France so much more, etc.

Finally it’s my turn to get my haircut. Now normally i get this one girl, blonde hair, really bad teeth, who knows what i do, how im usually stoned/drunk when i get my haircut, etc.

But this time i get a new girl….can’t remember her name for the life of me, but instantly she says “i bet your a artist, arn’t you?”

Here we go….

We continue to make small talk, she comments on how “adorable” i am several times. The questions start to get a little more personal, asking about my current dating status, what “i do for fun”, which i answer “drinking whiskey before getting my hair cut”.

I start to get a little nervous towards the end of the haircut when the flirting becomes kind of intense. I feel the sweat forming on my back as she tells me how cute i am again. The realization occurs to me that flirting in real life is very unknown terroritory to me.

Especially when it’s a mid 30’s hairdresser.

I pay for my haircut on the company card, the credit card machine fucks up printing out my receipt, and i stay longer. Now all 3 of the woman are commenting on how sweet i am with my big brown eyes.

I am terrified at this point, thinking only of escape and the rest of the Southern Comfort thats sitting in the back of my car.

I need to get a flowbee.

Salsa Dance Defense

PITTSBURGH, Pennsylvania (AP) — Tommy Chong, who played one half of the dope-smoking duo in the Cheech and Chong movies, asked for leniency from a judge Thursday but was sentenced to nine months in prison for conspiring to sell drug paraphernalia.

Chong’s attorneys argued for no jail time, saying the actor and comedian would use his celebrity to become a role model against drugs and would dedicate his life to public service.

The 65-year-old apologized to the court and his family, saying he “got carried away” with his movie character.

He admitted once having “a drug problem with marijuana” but said he beat it by redirecting his energy to salsa dancing.

“It’s a Latin American dance that’s awesome,” Chong told U.S. District Judge Arthur J. Schwab before the judge imposed the sentence, which included a $20,000 fine.