So i was at work today in the bathroom reading on my cellphone like i normally do. Whenever i connect and see BREAKING NEWS in all caps at the top of the page, i get a little excited. Something has happened! Something that might affect me! Terrorism! Big accident!

Newp, Brittany is getting divorced.

Glad i dropped the toliet paper for nothing.

Now the old me would go into a rant about how that shit shouldn’t matter to us but you’ve heard it all before……

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